Monday, October 16, 2006
before you start reading make sure u r not underage.. this is just a joke not to insult anyone.. any underage people caught trespassing will be prosecuted.. argh.. heck care.. enjoy! 1St joke..Little Johnny was just being potty trained and his mom tried this new method with 6 steps:1. Unbutton pants2. Pull pants down3. Pull foreskin back4. Pee5. Push foreskin forward6. Pull pants up and button upShe walked past the bathroom one day and heard Johnny going 1,2,3,4,5,6 and she was thinking she did good.Then she walked past the next day and heard him saying real fast 3-5, 3-5, 3-5…2Nd joke..A fire started on some grasslands near a farm. The village fire department was called to put out the fire. The fire was more than the village fire department could handle. Someone suggested that a nearby volunteer bunch be called. Despite some doubt that the volunteer outfit would be of any assistance, the call was made.
The volunteers arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They rumbled straight towards the fire, drove right into the middle of the flames and stopped! The firemen jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all directions. Soon they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two easily-controlled parts.
Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department's work and was so grateful that his farm had been spared, that right there on the spot he presented the volunteers with a check for Rs. 1,000. A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds.
"That ought to be obvious, " he responded, wiping ashes off his coat. "The first thing we're gonna do is get the brakes fixed on our truck!"3Rd joke..<br> A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: “Your butt is getting really big…….I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the Barbecue grill.”
With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife’s bottom.
“Yes, I was right………your butt is two inches wider than our barbecue grill!”
The woman chose to ignore her husband. Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
She answers: “Do you really think I’m going to fire up this big grill for one lousy little sausage?” 4th joke..<br> Two Italian men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The two fought and one KILLED the other to have the lady.
Two American men and a lady stranded on a desert island.They both had the lady TOGETHER.
Two French men and a lady stranded on a desert island.They killed the lady to have EACH OTHER.
Two Indonesian men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The first man claimed that island is independent and took the lady as his advisor. The second man swam to another island to search for jobs.
Two Thai men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The first man rented the lady to the second man for 2 baht a night.
Two Filipino men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The first man kidnapped the lady and asked for ransom from the other man.
Two Malaysian men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The lady ACCUSED the first man of sodomising the other because she was rejected by both.
And finally….
Two Singaporean men and a lady stranded on a desert island.The two men are still waiting for instructions from the GOVERNMENT on how to proceed.
-PuTeRa- ChiLLiNg OuT